(http://forum.getagreatgirl.com/) I noticed
a fantastic discussion about how to approach
a woman, and how to KEEP her attention.
One of the challenges is keeping the conversation
going and not get stalled after a minute or so.
There is a SOLUTION to this, as you will find
below.
COMMENTS/ QUESTION FROM A MAN
ON THE "GET A GREAT GIRL" FORUM
"I'm almost fearless with approaches & openers,
but man, I get stymied after a minute or so,
except with a captive audience, e.g. sitting near
a hot babe on the subway - since you are both
rooted in one spot for at least a few minutes, it's
easy to escalate the conversation and get
an email address.
The problem is when people are moving or only in
one spot for a moment, such as in a grocery store.
On the one hand, I love grocery stores, and have
gotten a date from one approach. But on the other
hand, the conversation has to move towards
interesting quickly, or she'll just move on after a
couple of pleasantries.
Case in point - I was shopping for laundry detergent
and saw a HB doing the same. My openner wasn't gold,
but at least it got things off the ground:
Me: "All right, which is the liquid detergent that lets
you never use fabric softening sheets again, is it
this Febreeze?"
Her: "I think so, but I'm allergic to Febreeze, so I
never use it. So I use the fabric softening sheets
in the dryer."
Me: "Yeah, but those things destroy your clothes -
the price you pay for no static cling."
Her: "I didn't know that."
And she walks away... (Boo hoo!)
Yeah, I know, boring topic, but in the heat of the
moment, what would you have done to ensure she
doesn't walk away, and then escalate?"
MY REPLY/SOLUTION
First, thank you for sharing what you have
been doing in the real world, the details
help everyone see that indeed this stuff
happens in the real world, such as your
date with the woman from the grocery
store.
There is a world of women out there, "ripe
for the picking" so to speak.
Here are some tips that should help ensure
she doesn't walk away, and to help you
escalate as well:
ADD THE FUN FACTOR QUICKLY:
Your motto should be "Everything she says, can and WILL be
used in my court of FUN/PLAYFUL/SEXUALITY/DOMINANCE!"
Remember also that women are CRAVING
a man who is both DOMINANT yet also
a GOOD MAN, who will treat her right,
and who also knows what it means to
be playful and naughty in a confident
way, not a truly arrogant way.
(Arrogance actually implies insecurity)
This COMBO is very VERY powerful.
So even if you started really neutral, that's fine
and prevents getting shut down right away, but
after that, it's time to JACK UP THE ENERGY
AND EMOTIONAL STIMULATION.
Turn up the dominance, the playfulness, the
naughtyness, and then transition ALL this
into a powerful CONNECTION.
And remember, she has PROVIDED all the
"material" for you, you just have to SEE IT
with new perspectives.
So, for example, with the Febreze, that's fine, and
she says she's allergic to it, IF YOU ARE IN THE PLAYFUL
STATE, and aren't afraid of losing her, you would easily
say any of the following things: (Feel the TONE of what's
going on here, more than the exact words.)
1. "Man, it's HARD to find good help these days!
But at least you're trying, I mean having allergies is
KIND of an excuse, I'm just allergic to boring people,
so I know about allergies, how about you?"
"What's the coolest thing a person could do in the
supermarket? Walk into the walk in freezer on
a blistering HOT day? Meet a total stranger?
What do you think?"
This helps motivate her to add some spice
to whatever she says now, investing herself
more into the conversation and also ensuring
that she enjoys this conversation as well.
Then, if her response to you is boring, you can
pretend to sneeze! Just say "Ahhhhhhhhchoooo!
Oh man, I can' t believe it, I think...I might be...
allergic to...."(Give her a mischievous smile!)
Also, another option, is when she said,
"I didn't know that," you could put on the
playful dominance and say, "Well, now that
you do, that will be 5 bucks for the free
advice, but since you are such a decent
conversationalist, I'll give you the special
for only 4 bucks!".
Then you can also TRANSITION from all this
into a greater and more serious CONNECTION:
"You know, life is so full of urgent things we
need to get done, that take TIME, but they
aren't really the IMPORTANT things, so laundry
is urgent, but it's not an "IMPORTANT" life goal,
it's IMPORTANT to make time for the things
you feel you MUST get out of life, you know
what I mean? "
At this point, she might fill the rest IN for you
and tell you about the TRULY IMPORTANT
things she wants to get done, which is a great
deeper conversation, and if she doesn't then
YOU can go onto describe the important things
that you feel are the real priorities in life.
And now you can go toward finding real bonding
things you share in common about priorities in life,
so when she gives you her number, she feels
VERY SOLID about doing so and wants you to
call her and continue this journey into discovering
who you are.
(By the way, man, I'm POSITIVE this is just you
needing to shake off the rust since you took the
Bootcamp over a year ago- you were great in
Bootcamp! You picked up a hot professor chick
at a vintage record store (talk about quality women!),
you got an email from a knockout blonde fitness
and health girl, and if I'm correct I think you hit
it off right away with executive type woman you
approached at the mall!
So don't knock yourself out, you clearly have
gained the skills, you just need to get sharp
again!)
I think what I just wrote here should help shake off
the rust and get you back into your zone when you
get out there to approach again!
We're almost out of time, but I had to share this
cool email that came in just the other day:
LETTER FROM A READER
Hi Michael,
I just want to let you know you have a terrific
approach that is far beyond what any of the
pickup artists teach. They teach men to
disrespect women and ruin their potential
for a positive, healthy relationship with the
right woman.
You teach men how to develop a relationship
with that right woman that is a product of two
healthy, mature-thinking adults, instead of
being all about sex, which is so rampant and
in-your-face in our society.
In addition to this, you teach men that it is
possible to actually be "the man" in a healthy way,
without being arrogant and trying to control
women, but asserting a natural male dominance
that real women actually love.
This is in such contrast to all the messages in
our society that try to stifle our natural,
testosterone-driven impulses, and you teach
us to channel those impulses into self improvement,
both inwardly and outwardly, to become the
"right" man for that "right" woman.
This kind of teaching is so helpful in so many areas
of life beyond just dating and relationships.
I have been enjoying and benefiting from your
wisdom, and I know that there are many men
out there who can be and are benefited by it as
well. I sincerely thank you for your much-needed
contributions.
Additionally, in one of your letters you talk about
visualizing your fear in order to become relaxed
about it and conquer it. That is a great concept,
and is confirmed by none other than Donald Trump.
In his classic book on negotiating, "Trump: The Art
of the Deal," he says: "It's been said that I believe
in the power of positive thinking. In fact, I believe
in the power of negative thinking. I happen to be
very conservative in business. I always go into
the deal anticipating the worst. If you plan for the
worst--if you can live with the worst--the good
will always take care of itself."
Keep up the good work,
John Paul
Washington, USA"
MY COMMENTS:
First of all, thank you for the kind words.
I actually did not know that about Trump,
but it's cool to see that he uses the same
psychological approach to success in
his own life.
If you can mentally DEAL with even the worst
case scenario, you are NO LONGER haunted
by it, and you can NATURALLY become
confident because the negativity has been
mentally CONFRONTED and you've made
peace with that possibility.
Once you've done that, you start to get
BORED with the negativity, so you
start to GENUINELY become positive,
it's not something you are TRYING to do,
it's for REAL because the negativity has
been DRAINED and weakened immensely.
And this gives you massive confidence.
A woman can sense that if she does not treat
you well, you REALLY WILL WALK AWAY.
She can actually SENSE this kind of confidence
in your demeanor long before she ever even
TRIES this kind of thing, so she treats you better
of course as a result.
Remember, you are now TRULY thinking positive,
because you've DEALT with the negative, so now
your positive thinking isn't a game or something
artificial, it's GENUINLEY flowing from you.
That adds even MORE charisma to you.
And on top of THAT, when you are searching for
a QUALITY woman, that means you are searching
for a woman who has done all the SAME work on
herself, and she KNOWS how rare it is to find
a person, especially a MAN who has been willing
to develop himself so powerfully in this way.
You become the kind of man that she doesn't
want to EVER let go of.
Again, this works on a hard-wired SURVIVAL
level that is primal and subconscious- she
feels that with SUCH man, things will be
"OK", SHE WILL BE SAFE AND LIFE WILL
EVEN BE FUN AND SEXUAL AS WELL.
Basically, you are giving off the vibes of being
a MAN who can SURVIVE in the JUNGLE of LIFE.
If you want the FULL PICTURE on how to attract
women ANYWHERE, I suggest you get my
Actions For Attraction CD Set by going here now:
http://getagreatgirl.com/ActionsForAttraction.html
To check out all my programs for getting
and keeping a quality girlfriend, go here:
http://getagreatgirl.com/catalogue.html
For now, tomorrow, and for always, BE THE MAN.
Michael Marks
Labels: did not write romance serial four became enemy certainly not courtesan slang internet top your tips spirit elle contracted madame boys normal guys
0 comments:
Post a Comment